Prankster and Princess came home today, two days early. It’s nice to have them back, it really is, but remember all that stuff I said about the quiet? Wow. The contrast is GREAT. I am really happy they’re here though. I wish Monkeyboy and Pitcher were home too. They come home tomorrow and Tuesday, respectively. And then we’ll be back in full swing.

Tomorrow I return to work. UGH. I like my job, and it isn’t even hard, so I’m not complaining, really. It’s just that i am in this rhythm of taking a nap everyday and wearing sweatpants for most of the day. It’s going to be a rough transition. Plus, Bucket doesn’t work this week and the big kids are still out of school, so it’s just me and the Monkey that will be hauling our butts into the world in the morning. UGH.

Twas the day after Christmas, and all was….quiet. I am not going to lie to you, sometimes, Bucket and I love the calm and lazy that we are able to enjoy when the kids go to their other parents’ houses. They’ve all been gone since early Christmas morning. We’ve slept whenever we wanted to, we’ve gone to the movies, we’ve hung out with family, we’ve shopped…we’ve been completely lazy. But right now, I have to tell you…it’s too quiet. I miss the kids. There was a time when I was without kids, and for me, there always seemed to be something missing. Granted, at that time, there was something missing in my marriage (to Monkeyboy’s dad). But there was also just a general unrest. I can’t explain to you how full life with kids is compared to life without. We run at a million miles an hour when they’re home. When they’re gone, the contrast is startling. We only have two weekends a month without them. The rest of the time, life revolves completely around running them to and fro, feeding them, making sure homework is done, etc. I am completely relaxed right now, but somewhat empty. We’ve talked a lot about what we’ll do to fill our time when they are all grown and gone. We have plans. I am hoping that as they gradually leave the nest, we’ll adapt to that change. But right now, all I can say is that it’s almost midnight and I feel like my day was mostly empty. A part of me has been gone since Monkeyboy went to his dad’s house late Christmas Eve. I’m torn between enjoying the slower, more relaxed pace of them being gone and counting the minutes until they return to us.

This post isn’t going to be about Christmas. Our Christmas was yesterday, and it was wonderful, but it’s just not what I want to write about right this minute.

I just got back from seeing Marley and Me with Bucket. I think I started crying halfway through and I still haven’t really stopped. Now, I cry at movies. I cry at books. I cry at commercials every once in a while. So the fact that I cried at the movie isn’t that shocking. It’s just who I am.

The movie will make you think of every good dog (or bad dog) that you’ve ever loved. For me, it made me think first of Logan, then of Chief and then of Phoenix. I know there were dogs before and after that, but for me, those were the three that were hardest to lose.

We got Logan, a doberman pincher, when I was about 3 or 4, I think. He died when I was a sophomore in high school. It’s a day I will never forget as long as I live. Phoenix was a cocker spaniel that had my brother’s heart from day one. I will never forget how he hung her name tag on his computer desk after she died. Chief was my favorite of any dog we ever had. She only lived three or four years and died tragically. She thought she was a person. She used to swim with us and try to sit in the kitchen chairs on our laps.

Our girls now, Layla and Marie, are rounding the corner on 11-years-old. They’re starting to go up the stairs a little slower. They’re starting to enjoy laying around a bit more. When they don’t go out on a regular basis, they can’t always hold it as long as they used to. The hardest thing about dogs is outliving them. That said, you haven’t lived until you’ve really loved a dog, and been really loved by one in return.

Yesterday was the first day of Christmas for the Crazykidfamily. The big kids went to their Step-dad’s family yesterday, and then to their mom’s family. They got some stuff, including gift cards, so they will undoubtedly ask to go spend them every single day until we concede.

Today we go to my mom’s house for the first real Christmas celebration for my side. I am really excited to see my family to see just how stupid my gift-exchange gifts look next to everyone else’s. Then Christmas Eve is Christmas day for us here, as all the kids go to their other parents’ house on Christmas day. I love this holiday, I really do. I need to find some way, though, to tie the event back to the real reason for it in the minds of our children. I feel like we are very involved in the gift-giving, and that’s good as I’ve been really focused on helping the kids understand that giving is so much better than receiving, but I think we are still really missing the religion in our celebration. Does anyone have any idea how to tie that in creatively? We can’t go to church Christmas Eve because the youngest leaves that night and we have to drive him all the way to Terre Haute. I am thinking about having prayer before the present-opening on Christmas Eve, but that’s really all I’ve come up with. Maybe we could read aloud the portion of the Bible that talks about the birth of Jesus.

Anyway, if anyone comes up with anything, let me know. The whirlwind of gift-buying and cookie-making has kept my mind and my body just on this side of complete exhaustion, but I’m so excited about the holiday this year. For one thing, Monkeyboy is understanding what is going on for the first time this year, and that’s fun. I took him to buy gifts to give the other kids the other day and it was so cute. He knew exactly what he wanted to get each of them, and he wrapped it all too!

If there’s one thing I can throw out there as a bit of wisdom, if you want to call it that, it’s that kids really make this holiday. I can’t believe how much more fun it is to have Christmas with kids than it ever was to have it without them. I highly recommend having a few, especially to my brother and sister-in-law. I need nieces and nephews to spoil!!!

So as I mentioned, Pitcher has his license.  I remember what it was like, I really do. Every day when I get home he asks me if he can borrow the car. He doesn’t have anywhere to go, really. But because I remember what it’s like, I always say yes when I’m able. So tonight I told him that he could have the car as long as he’d pick up some groceries for me. I gave him the list and off he went at about 6:30. It is now 8:10 and he isn’t home. I am trying not to smother him. I texted him and asked him if he is alright. He texted back “ya.” So here I sit, waiting for him to make it safely home.

Well, friends, it’s the holiday season. This means that my house looks like a whirlwind has blown through it, as no one has time to do anything related to house-keeping. In January we’ll have to have another “cleaning day,” which is an invention of mine the kids have nightmares about.

Here’s an update on the crazykidfamily:

I’ve been away from my blog for a while, mostly because I’ve been studying for a test I had to take for my classes for my job. I passed, so yay, I’m back. No more school for me until mid-January.

Bucket has been working himself half to death, because we’re trying to pay off some nagging bills and give our kids a decent Christmas.

Pitcher got his license last week, and recently started a job at Fazoli’s.

Princess has started color guard again, and much to my delight, has been reading the “Twilight” series. I can’t wait for her to be done with Eclipse so I’ll have someone to talk about it with!

Prankster is adjusting to his new set of braces. He holds his mouth a little differently and I kind of miss his little-boy smiles.

Monkeyboy has become a drama king. He has big, fake-crying fits in which he declares “No one will ever like me again!” whenever he gets the slightest scolding.

This weekend Bucket and I tried to finish our Christmas shopping. We’re about 75% done at this point. We also hung lights on the house. I’m not afraid of heights, but the experience was a little scary for me.

Next weekend starts the family Christmas gatherings for us. It is sure to be filled with craziness and great memories.

I hope to make gingerbread men with the kids this week. I’m sure that will give me a fun story to post here! Stay tuned…

I hope the holiday season is going well for everyone, and that even though we’re all busy and the economy is bleak, we can all remember that the story behind the season is both timeless and magnificent.

The title is a nod to Blazing Saddles, simply cause I can’t say “I’m tired” without thinking of Lily Von Schtup (or however it’s spelled).

I’m exhausted. It’s been a hellish week at work, a hectic week at home and I’m studying for my test that is a week from tomorrow. “Let’s face it, I’m pooped.” Already this week I’ve had Prankster getting his braces (a story for another day…maybe one day when I’m awake), Princess’s choir concert (where I sat with Bucket’s parents, and as an added bonus, his ex-wife…lots of love in that room), a bake sale, and tomorrow I have a parent meeting for Color Guard to look forward to.

These are the days that Bucket being on nights is a significant and trying burden. Anyway, I’ll be back to blogging soon. Maybe I’ll even be coherent next time.